Postive Reframing
Positive reframing is a classic technique used in cognitive behavioral therapy. The premise of this type of thinking is that when you change your thoughts, you change your feelings and actions. Often our thoughts are based on underlying assumptions and patterns of repetition that started at birth. Mark Twain aptly said, “I’ve had a lot of worries in my life, most of which have never happened.”
Your brain is constantly forming new synapses and working to form a path of least resistance. This helps the brain and body conserve energy. You can retrain yourself to be less negative thus reducing stress, pain and anxiety. Using positive reframes is especially helpful when battling your inner critic, which is often more harsh than any outside judgement. Likewise, it is easy to label yourself or someone else negatively rather than see the positive attributes because your brain has been trained to do so.
Try quieting your inner critic and retraining you automatic thoughts with tender and loving reframes;
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Use milder wording – “I hate that person” changed to “I am annoyed at that person right now” (see picture above)
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How can you learn from a negative experience? – When something goes wrong instead of assigning blame or criticism, think about how you can learn from this for next time. This will increase your problem solving skills and victimization.
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Avoid using never and always- Instead use sometimes, right now, a lot of times, most of the time or often.
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Talk to yourself like you would a great friend – When the inner critic is taking over gently replace the critic with yourself and pretend you are talking to a friend. It is amazing how more kind, gentle and positive we are to others vs ourselves.
How to reframe
Juniper Owens, LCSW, CPT, LMT is co-founder, wellness director and therapist with Bridge Counseling and Wellness. Juniper specializes in the holistic treatment of anxiety; OCD, PTSD, panic, phobias, relationship anxiety, worry and fear, general anxiety and stress management.